Then there was Archibald 

Where do I start about Archibald! What an absolute sweetie.

Ring Ring! 

“Hello, who am I speaking too?”

” it’s Archibald my dear, ”

“Hello Archibald, or may I call youArchie?”

“Oh of course my dear”

“What can I do for you Archie?”

“Well my dear, I’m feeling rather amorous and my penis is quite erect ”

” oh Archie, how very saucy of you, may I ask how old you are?”

“Yes my dear, I’m 87, but it’s ok my doctor says it’s good for my circulation to be sexually active”

” well that’s wonderful Archie, we’ll just take it nice and gently shall we ?”

“Yes please my dear, I would love to put my penis in your vagina”

What a refreshing change, just a sweet little old man, bless his heart, old fashioned romanticism, no need for crudeness here, just loving words 

“Then my dear, I want to fuck the crap out of you!” 

OH !!! 

Then there was George, this was even more surprising

Ring Ring!

“Hello, who am I speaking too?”

” Hello , it’s George, you have a lovely voice”

“Thank you George , what can I do for you?”

“I’m 94 my dear, but it doesn’t stop me feeling rather horny on occasions and I wondered if a lovely young lady like you could help me out”

” of course I can George”

” my wife and I always had a wonderful sex life”

“L think that’s lovely George, can I ask when you lost her?”

“Lost her”

“Yes, when did she pass away?”

” oh no my dear. Ha ha , did you hear that Ethel? The young lady thinks your dead”

“Ha ha , no my dear, I’m sitting here doing my knitting, I can’t be doing with all that these days so George just gets on with it. Anyway, hurry up George, dinner is nearly ready”

“Alright Ethel, you know I’m not as quick as I used to be”

Awkward  !! 

Awkward !! 

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