Anyone for Dogging ?

I like to think I am very professional in my work , but there are times when a call is more like a comedy playhouse. This one was probably the most bizarre and I’m ashamed to say I totaly lost the plot. 

Ring Ring 

“Hello, who am I speaking g too ?”

“Hello there, I’m Roland ”

” hello Roland , what can I do for you?”

“Well Sofia, I’d like to share my experience of dogging with you”

Oh joy be unconfined, just what I need to hear after an hour of traipsing around sainsburys 

“Hmmm do go on Roland ”

“I don’t like to go too close , so I parked the car down the lane and walked the rest of the way , it’s well known so I was pretty confident I’d be lucky. As I approached the bushes , sure enough I could hear a rustling and some very heavy breathing . I got my cock out , which was already hard with anticipation .  But suddenly this huge cow appeared from behind the bushes. God knows how it got out of the field”

” whoah, wait, no no Roland , we can’t go any further with this conversation , this is definitely out of bounds”

“Oh not you as well Sofia. No it’s nothing like that. The fucking thing chased me down the lane. I got to the car, I was in such a panic  I dropped the keys. When I bent down to pick them up she butted me in the ass. I felt the impact when my head hit the car”

By this time I could feel the laughter building from the pit of my stomach , I bit down on my hand as Roland continued.

“I woke up in hospital . There were two police officers waiting to talk to me, one was a woman which didn’t help. When they found me the cow was standing over me and of course I still had my cock out, so they wanted to know what my intention was towards the cow”

” mmmmmmm oh” 😂😂😂😂😂

“I mean , have you seen the state of a cows ass Sofia ? I wouldn’t touch it with theirs let alone mine. They took some convincing I can tell you. Anyway , I think it was a sign from god telling me I shouldn’t go dogging anymore, what do you think Sofia ?”

” ummmmmm yep” 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

“It means I’ll have to learn to play chess as that’s where my wife thinks I am every week , but I guess I need a new hobby anyway ”

“Mmmmmm yep ” 😂😂😂😂😂

“Thanks for your advice Sofia . I’ve enjoyed out chat . I might phone you again if that’s ok ?”

“Sure, bye Roland” 

“Bye sofia’. Click 


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